............I m not good in many things.............

Life is sometimes a treasure hunt. You never know where you may wind up, and sometimes all you can do is to follow the clues. I never knew what inspires me to write. A real background or it may be the spoken word. It may be a sentence that jumps out at me from the written page or something that may have arrived via a friend.
Imagination has always been a great inspiration to pen down something. After a very long time, ‘m again making up with my blog.....with something new....and I really don’t know what is the real motivation or inspiration behind it.

I am not good in many things and its same, covering a day long journey couched on an upper berth in sleeper class of a mail express train and that too after living such few beautiful moments which were mere a dream to me before yesterday.
To love and to get back love is the most beautiful thing that can bloom in a person’s life. I was forced to cross the road holding her hand although she herself used to get afraid near the speeding vehicles and does the same(holding hand of her friend) at crossings...........
...............yeaah, maybe she was trying to be over protective for me.

Walking round the floor, few visible lines on her forehead, holding mobile near her right ear and her long hair playing loose at her face, that’s how she welcomed me.
The most unusual thing with her first appearance and the most usual thing with her appearance was that she was looking very pretty as always befitting a queen even with the ear pain, she was trying to conceal behind her eyes.
I persuaded her few times why don’t we go and see a doctor but she denied (as she don’t want my 30 hrs long reach out ending whole at Docs place).

I am not good in many things and this time I failed whenever I tried to make her smile.........Haan, as a consolation she showed her teeth few times.
The centre of the city is the nicest place for those who hang more often as they know the hideouts there. For us it meant, just strolling into the mall, halting at the bookshops, moving around the hanging garments and deliberately throwing the smile to the guards........... .......(sorry yaar.....next time sure...)

“I will hold you if u will faint”, I replied when she asked me if I could walk in the sun with her........ (The afternoon sun at 13 degree latitude will certainly dehydrate you if you are not prepared) and we started off.............

I am not good in many a things and this time....................in facing her big staring eyes. (As if saying vegetarian hoon nahi to...........). Whenever I tried to be on her right side while walking down the heavily trafficked road, she showed the same.........the same staring, eyes....and I had nothing to reply...in spite to gaze away.
Land has its own beauty and ocean has of its own. But the place where the both meet each other is beyond the limit of beautification. Whenever I got the chance to be at these places it felt like as if the poet inside me is having a duel with the other one inside who use to collect the beautiful definitions for the life...the philosophical one. And this time I was facing the place, the beautiful place with someone even more beautiful, just beside me.


I am not good in many things and this time the mishap occurred with my tongue-eye co-ordination. Frankly admitting, I couldn’t talk her properly while looking into her beautiful chocolaty eyes.....I almost forgot my words few times while witnessing her beauty ........for me, which had just emerged out of my dreams.
She snapped, “Aise mat dekho”.
She wanted to sit just beside the waterline. I offered her my hand while walking and she took it..........only for few steps......... trying to balance herself on the sand.
Soon we were facing the eastern sea winds. We had grounded ourselves on the sand finally. Such an unforgettable feeling, hard to fix in the words, was that. Now she was there, talking freely...............So many things.......and I was there, listening and wishing her talks never get finished. In my mind, it was all perfect
The Sun was gone, almost behind The Queen Mary’s College and she wished..........she should leave. She held my hand for few steps again when I offered during our back journey on sand but soon left my hand. As we took few more steps ahead she got hold of my shirt as she had almost lost her balance. We sat beside the road as I don’t want to leave and she......maybe........maybe not.
Few times I found her face getting blurred in my eyes.........I dnno why.
Finally we started for the return journey. As the auto driver took off the auto, she said him, “Anna slowly – slowly”. .........and again her face got blurred in my eyes, more than once.........a bit frequent this time...................maybe I was having my last 20 minutes with her.......... We were holding each other’s hand........She showed me her other hand and told, “I’ll slap you if you will make such a terrible face.

(A bad face, overlapped with a sad face can’t make a good scene either).

And she slapped me twice on my left cheek, tender touch, as two reminders she set for me and twice on my right cheek against the reminder request made to her by one of my biggest enemy......Us se to mai baad me nipat lungaa ......(mere gussey k liye)....the blurring started again................................................ She held me by arms just for a while and pulled towards her......... (As if a lady wanted to embrace a child who’s crying coz his favourite toy has been taken from him).......but left my arms. Her face was almost drowned in my eyes and this time they broke the barrier.........two narrow lines balancing each side to my nose......I looked away. I dropped her...a formal handshake and as I moved my hand for the last touch.......the driver drove away........................................
Traffic, driver, and the big towers around, everything started getting blurred in my eyes but this time one thing was missing, her face........for which everything was blurring.

I am not good in many things and this time I dint tell the driver to stop..............dint run to her to hold her hand...............to wrap my arms around her..........to say all the things I had said to her countless times...............................to don’t let her go..................to never let her go.
I was in auto.
I was silent but my eyes kept talking.
But I dint let her go.....................................It was she.................................................... ...............who let me walk away.